December 20, 2009
Days 3 and 4
Friday night was the cast party for the show I'm working on right now. I was so hungry backstage, so I texted my good buddy and said "HALP WHAT DO I EAT AT CAST PARTY!?" She gave me some helpful suggestions, and told me she'd be asking for a report the next day. Having that kind of accountability really helps me SO much.
My sisters-in-law and I also had our 2nd Annual Holiday Cookie Baking day yesterday. Guh. My sisters-in-law are quite thin (and easily so...it seems like they don't even try), and were munching on Whataburger taquitos when I got there. Luckily I had anticipated this and had eaten on my own before I left the house. I only had a small bite of each kind of cookie we baked (and completely avoided the chocolate self-filling cupcakes - which were filled with cream cheese and chocolate chips) and I drank water most of the day -- after my morning cup of Joe of course.
Last night, after the show, the group all went to Sweetwater in Denton, which was like MY OWN PERSONAL HELL. I knew I wasn't really HUNGRY, but being there and not eating cheese fries or fried pickles or even having a beer was REALLY hard for me. But, I managed, and since I was feeling a bit hungry when I got home, I had a small bowl of Special K Vanilla Almond Cereal instead.
Accomplishments:
* Resisting Temptation at at least 3 separate occasions
* Entering in my calories and coming in at or UNDER my goal
* Telling my friends and family WHY I'm making these choices, so that they don't hound me (or ask me if I'm pregnant) when I avoid snacks and alcohol.
Onward we go.
December 18, 2009
The Day of Reckoning, plus 1 and 2
This is the first time in my life I have ever counted calories. I've always been against it, and I think it's because of my mother. She is CONSUMED with it, and in a really obnoxious way. I just knew I didn't want to be one of those obnoxious fitness nuts that people can't stand to be around, and so I ended up going wayyyyyyyyy too far the other direction.
It took seeing videos of myself singing at a concert to really wake me up. It also completely killed my buzz of having a very successful musical project come to fruition, but, whatever works I guess. I knew I had to make a change.
Immediately.
Could I have picked a more difficult time to start tracking calories and watching what I eat? Seriously. It's Chistmas time and there is FOOD ALL AROUND ME AT ALL TIMES. This is going to be really hard. But, I did NOT want to just tell myself "Oh, I'll wait until after New Year's to really get started."
It's time to get serious. It's time to make a change. I can already tell that the hardest part is going to be getting my body used to a fairly drastic drop in calorie intake every day. I'm hungry, and I need to buy things that I can snack on without going through my daily calories goal. I know I can do this. I KNOW I can.
This is the beginning of what I hope will be a long and VERY fruitful journey.
August 26, 2009
Um...hi.
I'm not saying that I'm going to be abandoning this blog forever, but I will encourage any of you who are interested to go ahead and add that puppy to your Google Reader. I still don't post daily over there, but I do post more often, and with more of what I've been busy doing lately (performing, auditioning, stage managing, reviewing shows, etc).
So. How are you? :)
June 2, 2009
May 26, 2009
Getting Married Today
Everybody ______ a Critic
Well, put another script on the shelf for posterity. Crazy For You closed on May 10th after what I feel was a VERY successful run. We sold out the entire second weekend of performances, which is a huge step in the right direction for MTD, and I could not be more proud of this show. The cast, the production team, the crew -- everyone and I mean everyone worked their asses off on this show, and we all were boo-hooing on the last performance. Not just because it was the last performance, but because we truly all formed an emotional bond that I can't describe to anyone who hasn't been a part of such a process. I'm blessed to have known and worked with ALL of them, and my thanks go out to each and every new relationship I formed within this production process.
That being said, the reviews are in, and prove that everyone does in fact have their own opinion and that you can't please everyone! This one was written and posted by John Garcia of The Column, a weekly email group that began as a source for Dallas/Ft. Worth theatre-lovers and has expanded to more than 12,000 subscribers. This one was written by a couple of new reviewers who are just starting their "business" as it were and only have a couple of reviews up.
No matter what, though, nothing will take away from my experience and my views on a wonderful, exhausting, emotional, and rewarding experience.
Now. What's next?
I'm going to be assistant stage managing Denton Community Theatre's production of Don't Dress for Dinner, which is a play opening the first weekend in June, and there's a chance I'll be auditioning for a new adaptation/collaboration piece with a smaller theatre in Denton that same weekend. I'll try to be better at keeping everyone posted. I know, I've been bad...but work + two shows back-to-back = one stressed out and tired and BUSY lady! Summer will be a lot more laid back. :)
P.S. those beautiful photos above were taken by my friend and Very Favorite Photographer, Lynn Michelle when I invited her to be my guest at our preview performance. She rules...as usual.
April 21, 2009
A month? Really?
So what's been going on with me? Well...a lot.
Work has been really insane for the past three weeks or so, and will probably continue to be insane for another three weeks. It's deadline season around here, and we're all working long hours to make sure that our final product is as helpful and informative as it can be to new and prospective students. Whew.
Operaboy and I both have been REALLY busy with our respective rehearsal schedules, him with Fort Worth Opera (he's working on three operas with them right now: Carmen, La Cenerentola, and Dead Man Walking), and I with Crazy For You (that whole process is going to be a blog entry on its own here soon...I promise).
The puppy is doing VERY well. Carmen has adapted to her new home wonderfully. She's learning commands and has just about mastered "sit" and "lay down," but we're still having trouble with "stay" and "stop biting me b/c your little needle baby teeth hurt like a bitch." Yeah we'll keep working on that one. Here's our first family picture, from Easter:
Oh, and due to a director's choice, I am now playing Irene as a VERY sassy redhead:
It's a pretty big change, but I LOVE it. My favorite compliment so far has been that I strongly resemble X-Men character Jean Grey/Phoenix. To wit:
Pretty badass, huh? :)
And yes, Operaboy loves the hair color.
So...work and shows. And Carmen. That's really it! I'd like to say I've been up to much more exciting things, but alas, I have not.
How are you?
March 25, 2009
MckPrayers
March 19, 2009
Perfectly Marvelous
Rest in peace, Natasha.
March 18, 2009
Carmen, je t'aime!
Everybody, meet Carmen. Carmen, meet everybody.
Obviously, we kept the dog.
We did put up
Operaboy has been FANTASTIC with her, since he's home during the day. The result of which is that she loves him more than she loves me, but that's okay. She snuggles with Mommy on the weekends while Daddy sleeps in.
Right now we're in the middle of potty training and crate training, neither of which are easy OR fun. She kept me up, whining, until 3:30am on Monday night, so yesterday was a very bleary-eyed day for me. We also think she was a bit mad at us on Monday night. She fought us tooth and nail on her last dose of worming medication (nummy!) and peed in the house 3 times that day (for which she was promptly taken outside and left there while we cleaned up), AND we put her in her crate alone for the first time in the living room while we slept. Ack. I was ready to punt her across the street by yesterday morning.
However, yesterday was a VERY good day. No messes in the house, she went on a walk with us on her new leash, and she stayed in the crate for a few hours at a time during the day yesterday so that she could get acclimated to it. No whining last night from what I've heard anyway (I crashed at 9pm after going all day on 4 hours sleep yesterday). She's being VERY good. Operaboy said she even hung out in her crate (with the door open) for a few hours yesterday evening while he worked on his opera.
Which brings me to her name...
Operaboy is preparing for and learning three opera choruses right now in preparation for his upcoming gig with Ft. Worth Opera. One of them happens to be Bizet's Carmen. He was working on this opera when we found the puppy, AND she's kind of a little gypsy (since we found her wandering) AND we've always wanted to pick an operatic or musical name for our first pet. Thus she was christened Carmen.
NOT Sarah Brightman, as my friend Justin so strongly recommended, though he continues to call her that.
So, I guess we expanded our family before we were ready, but we're blessed nonetheless. Let's hope this trend DOES NOT continue, if you get my drift.
But really...how could we say no to that face?
March 9, 2009
Found a puppy!
This morning as Operaboy and I were leaving the house, we noticed we had a visitor!
Operaboy kept looking over at our hedges near the gate to the backyard with a funny look on his face, and I said "What are you doing? Let's go!" Finally he said, "Do you hear that?" I stopped and I heard what he was talking about...our hedges were rustling. Suddenly a sweet little puppy face popped out!
She had burrowed herself way back into our hedges. She went right back in and came out on the other side and made her way toward me cautiously (and I her in the same fashion). She looked very wobbly, which implied either fear or youth (or both) to me. She wasn't wearing a collar or tags, either. :( I had to go to work, and as we were driving away she backed herself back into the hedge (very odd behavior).
When Operaboy got home, he got in G-mail chat and told me that he'd let her in the house (ack!) and that she was passed out watching ESPN. Haha! Those are the pictures above. She was very sweet to him and not bitey or aggressive at all. I told him to let her outside and go get her some food, at least until we can put up some flyers and/or call the newspaper.
I'll take some better pictures of her face tonight to make the flyers, but we think she might have a little pit bull in her, and maybe some beagle, based on her eyes, coloring, and ears. Who knows, though. This is bad...I want her! I am already thinking of names for her, which I really shouldn't do b/c I'll just get attached!
Part of me is hoping that nobody will claim her! One of the LAST things we need right now is a puppy, but she did find our house, so who knows! I'll update when I can...
February 23, 2009
Opening Weekend
This past weekend we finally opened the show, and I have to say it was a rousing success. Even with (what I felt was) little advertising, word-of-mouth must have gotten around, because we had fairly full houses on both Friday (opening) and Saturday nights. Sunday's matinee was very sparse, but they were still a supportive and energetic crowd.
Two of my fellow bloggers showed up as well, so thank you to Carie and Smash for showing up and being so supportive and fun! Carie blogged about her thoughts here, and even included a few GREAT pictures! I LOVE the one of the marquee outside the theatre and of course the one of Carie and me together after the show. Please excuse the excess of makeup...I hadn't gotten out of costume and make up yet. :)
I'm already a little sad knowing that this weekend is our last, and I can't believe there are only 3 performances left. I love this show, and I could play this role forever and never get tired of it.
This cast and crew has been so great, and I love everyone of them for so many reasons.
Next on the docket: auditions for Crazy For You tomorrow night! No rest for the weary!
February 10, 2009
Teaser Tuesdays - 2/10
Teaser Tuesdays: Grab your current read.Let the book fall open to a random page.
Share with us two (2) “teaser” sentences from that page, somewhere between lines 7 and 12.
You also need to share the title of the book that you’re getting your “teaser” from … that way people can have some great book recommendations if they like the teaser you’ve given!
Please avoid spoilers!
My Teaser sentences:
Bobby: I rushed out of there and I drove around until I could find a liquor store and a drugstore open and I got all this champagne and the oil and finally I started back to the motel and -- I --could not -- find -- it. I looked for over three hours.
From the libretto of "Company," the musical I'm currently working on. Book by George Furth, music and lyrics by Stephen Sondheim.
You guys? I don't have time to read. I PROMISE that as of March 1st I'll be done with this show and will actually start reading and posting real "Teaser Tuesdays" posts again. Sorry. :)
February 9, 2009
The Last Concert
The last concert....
Friday night I did something I have done many times- I sang a concert. I greeted members of the audience,congratulated my colleagues, and drove home. I took off my tux, put my studs and cuff links in the jewelry box, and dressed for bed.
Some years ago as I did that, I began to muse on how often most men wear a tuxedo. Maybe two or three times-the senior prom, their wedding, weddings of friends and family. But it is something I do several times a year. I actually have something of a
ritual. I take the tux to the cleaners, so I won't have to think about it next time. I put the score back on the shelf. I make a folder for the program, reviews, etc. and put it in the "Performances" file cabinet drawer.
As I thought about singing concerts, though, it occurred to me that one day I will do
it for the last time. One last time I will greet the audience, congratulate my
colleagues, drive home, and take off my tux. Will I know it's the last time? If I do, will it make a difference in how I sing? Will I be a weepy mess, or will I give the performance of a lifetime?
At that moment I softly voiced a prayer that I would not live to see the day when I wasn't singing. Of course,that would mean that I will die with SOMETHING left unsung. But perhaps that is for the best. I have known singers who stopped singing with many years left in their lives. True, they found satisfaction in other things. They taught,traveled, spent time with hobbies they had neglected during their singing
careers. They enjoyed time with their children and grandchildren, making up for
lost time.
But I want to sing. I want to sing until the end. Let me die onstage just like Leonard Warren, and I will die happy. I would die doing what I love to do.
If I do get to choose the time and place of my "last concert", I imagine it will be at my church. I will close with "Give me Jesus"...
"Oh when I come to die, Give me Jesus..."
But God only knows...
I know how he feels.
February 8, 2009
A Feminine Ending
Disclaimer: this review is unsolicited. I just really wanted to offer up my own succinct and, hopefully grammatically correct, thoughts on what I think is an incredible piece of theatre not to be missed if you're in the Dallas/Ft. Worth area.)
Amanda Blue (played by Jessica Wiggers) tells us in the opening lines of A Feminine Ending that, "For anyone who cares to know or knows enough to care," there are gender roles in music - masculine and feminine. A feminine ending is characterized by a musical phrase or movement ending on an "unstressed, or weak cadence." She goes on to muse about how clearly gender roles are asserted not only in music or in language, but also in life and in the choices one makes or the expectations he or she is supposed to meet.
An aspiring composer, Amanda must put her dreams on hold as she works a less than fulfilling day job to support her "almost famous" fiancé, Jack Handel (Chad Halbrook) as a means to reach the extraordinary life he has promised they will have some day. As Jack rises in his quest for fame, Amanda becomes increasingly discontent with her life, a problem that is exacerbated by a frantic phone call from her mother Kim (Cindy Beall), imploring Amanda to come home to New Hampshire for the weekend. It turns out that Kim has, once again, decided to assert herself and leave her husband David (Jerry Crow). As Amanda's frustration level rises and she decides to go back to New York, she runs into The One That Got Away, her high school boyfriend Billy (Dan Forsythe).
Throughout the course of Sarah Treem's beautifully written script, Amanda finds herself in a position in which she must evaluate her career, her impending marriage, her role as a daughter, and finally make a decision as to whether or not she wants to continue putting the needs of others before her own dreams and aspirations.
As the costume designer as well as in her directorial debut, Emily Scott Banks shines. The actors clearly understand the relationships between their characters, and they move and interact with a purpose and an ease and comfort that makes them heartbreakingly realistic. Her costume design is simple, but wonderfully symbolic. Amanda's scarves in the first act, while stylish and attractive, seem to represent the choke-hold that is placed upon her by her fear of going out on a limb and rejecting conventions. Jack's outfits change by scene, and are almost comically trendy: an intentionally weathered pair of jeans, a retro-western shirt with pearl snaps, and a foam-front cap placed on top of sexy, tousled hair.
The technical aspects of this production are flawless. Leann Ellis's lighting design coupled with sound designer Emily Young's choices of songs and musical interludes brought goosebumps to my arms at times. There are beautiful and intricate gobos used to indicate falling snow, a blooming tree, an apple orchard, all of which subtly enhance what might otherwise be long and tedious monologues within the script. Set designer Clare Floyd-DeVries creates a beautiful, simplistic set that is functional as well as eye-catching. What appears at first to be a simple wooden set later showcases a hidden bed (which doubles as a couch in the scenes taking place in Amanda's New Hampshire home) or an end table. The walls of the studio theatre are draped with flowing curtains of chiffon, giving a soft and feminine feeling that is not lost in its symbolism.
The major kudos of this production, however, must go to the actors. There is not a weak moment in this production. Chad Halbrook, a gorgeous man who is not shy about showing off his body, plays Jack flawlessly. The character of Jack lends itself to being easily played as a shallow, wannabe rock star, but Halbrook gives Jack more depth than that, and creates some tender moments with Amanda as easily as he makes the audience laugh. Cindy Beall and Jerry Crow are equal parts funny and poignant as Amanda's estranged parents. Beall gives a powerful performance as a housewife who, after 30 years of burying her passions in order to be a dutiful wife and mother, finally decides to follow her own dreams. Crow makes a grand impression in his little stage time as Amanda's father, a man who has likely had the same routine for 30 years, and is truly stunned that his wife would leave him, after what we are led to believe have been several threats over the course of their marriage.
As Amanda's high school boyfriend Billy, Dan Forsythe brings an entirely different dynamic to the cast. He is simple, kind, and lacks pretention. While at first he appears to be a bit of a goofball, we discover with Amanda that he is intelligent and well-spoken, and Amanda's rekindled attraction to him in the apple orchard is understandable and believable. My only issue with Forsythe's performance is his choice of dialect, which unfortunately emphasizes the "goofball" aspect a bit too much at times. I was unsure if this was a character choice or an attempt at a New England accent. Nevertheless, his portrayal of Billy is endearing and lovely.
The standout performer in this cast is Jessica Wiggers as Amanda. She rarely leaves the stage, and she stays connected to the character at all times. When she breaks the proverbial "fourth wall" and addresses the audience directly, it is natural and conversational, and she moves back into her interactions with other characters seamlessly and effortlessly. She even deadpans some of her pantomimed actions to the audience ("I'm back in New York now...and this is the door to my apartment") humorously, but without taking them out of the moment or distracting from the emotional environment she's created in a previous scene. She's wonderfully real, and any person in the audience should be able to empathize with at least one, if not several, of the stops along Amanda's journey to find and "trust a woman's voice in a man's world."
The play runs through February 13, 2009 at the WaterTower Theatre in Addison, Texas. The studio theatre is small and tickets will likely sell out quickly, so run - don't walk - to the website or to the nearest phone, and buy your tickets now for this beautiful and thought-provoking piece of theatre. You will be glad you did.
February 6, 2009
Alternate Endings
Last night a bunch of us went out after rehearsal for one of our Group Therapy (read: going out and complaining/worrying/stressing) sessions and we were talking about the different scenes and how the characters relate to one another. We were discussing how the two scenes that sort of bookend Act I are some of our favorites, and probably because they are so extreme in content. The Harry/Sarah scene is hilarious, while the Amy/Paul scene is much more serious and emotional.
Someone mentioned that at one point, Sondheim had written a song called "Multitudes of Amys" to end Act I while still fleshing out the show and how he wanted Bobby to develop. The current song, "Marry Me a Little," is BEAUTIFUL, and our Bobby sings it so freaking well, but of course my curiosity got the best of me this morning, so off to YouTube I went to see what I could find.
I found a clip of John Lloyd Young (of "Jersey Boys" fame) singing "Multitudes of Amys" in a cabaret-style setting.
It is absolutely beautiful, which isn't a big shocker. It's this blogger's opinion that anything Sondheim writes is pure genius.
I still prefer "Marry Me a Little" in context of the show, because I simply prefer the direction that it takes the characters of Paul and Amy. But, I like knowing what might have been. :)
See for yourself!
John Lloyd Young singing "Multitudes of Amys:"
Raúl Esparza singing "Marry Me a Little:"
February 5, 2009
Office Pet Peeve
Just a friendly note (which I am thisclose to actually writing and soldering to the coffee pot): If you happen to finish the coffee in the break room, DO NOT simply set the empty pot back on the warming tray and be on your merry way.
Also, do not leave only mere swill in the bottom of the pot. Does that look like enough for a cup to you? No. It does not.
Make a fresh pot, damn you!
This is a crime that, in my opinion, should be punishable by death.
By the way....the image above? I totally have it hanging in my office.
February 4, 2009
Antiquated
So.
I know I haven't blogged in FOREVER, but honestly? Life has been more than a little busy/exhausting/crazy/pick an adjective here lately. Oh and I also finally caught the Annual Winter Plague, so that had me laid up most of the weekend in bed with a box of tissues.
Rehearsals for the show are going really well, I think. There's always that point about 3 weeks away from opening night when you honestly wonder "When/How the hell is this thing going to come together?" and I think we reached and passed that point very quickly. Our director and assistant director have been encouraging us to try to get off book a week ahead of schedule, and I'm happy to say that most, if not all, of the cast has taken that to heart and really tried to get the scripts out of our hands.
It's hard, and slightly terrifying. It's one of the ultimate "deer in the headlights" feelings, in my opinion, when there's a silence onstage, and you can read your own fear mirrored in your castmate's eyes as you wonder, "Okay is this my line? Or yours? What are we DOING NEXT??"
However, even as we stumble through, we've already made some tremendous progress in developing our characters and character relationships just by getting the script/crutch out of the picture. I'm proud of the cast and crew, and I can't believe we're already only two and a half weeks from opening night. :)
So another reason I haven't really been blogging...
I've actually started writing in a journal. No, really. Writing. Remember writing? That thing we did before keyboards were mainstream? Yeah! That!! My hand is killing me by about 7 sentences into each entry, but I'm building up stamina and writing a little more each day.
I've never been good at keeping a diary or a journal. Ever. Even as a little girl, I'd write fervently for a few days and then the thing would get discarded, thrown away, or just simply covered in dust and left between the mattresses and forgotten about. This time feels different, though.
I don't know if it's because I'm older and "wiser," or because I'm doing it as part of a routine (I get in bed each night and write for about 20 minutes or so), or maybe even because I'm using an actual, grown-up journal...like with a bookmark and one of those elastic thingies that holds the pages shut.
Whatever it is, I'm enjoying it. I like leaving my mark. I like thinking that, maybe some day, my child/grandchild/niece/nephew may find it in an attic or in an old box with my wedding album and high school yearbooks and find a really cool window into what life was like for me at a point in time. To actually see my handwriting and notice that we write our Ms the same way.
So, that's why I haven't been around much. I find it tiresome to try to come up with material for two journals (one tangible, one online), and sometimes the things I actually, physically write are not things that I want the entire blogosphere to see. There will probably be times when I'll write something that I think is pure gold, and I'll take the time to transcribe it on here, probably. But, for the most part it may just be a bit more YouTube clips I love, or articles I think are interesting, or book reviews (I'll try to get back into Teaser Tuesdays...I know, I've failed lately at them. But, to be fair, I'm not reading anything at the moment.), etc.
Thanks for sticking around. :)
January 26, 2009
Pick me, pick me!
This photo was taken behind the lobby doors of the Campus Theatre, which is where Operaboy and I met (oh so many years ago).
Unfortunately I can't ask you all to go and pad the votes for this image, because the winners will be chosen by other photographers...
But, if it wins, I get, to quote Lynn, a "huge stinkin' canvas of it." EXCITING!
Thanks so much, Lynn!! I'm truly honored that you love this picture enough to enter it into a competition!
January 23, 2009
PS22
Today was one of those days.
Ladies, and gentlemen, let me introduce you to the PS22 Chorus. How do I not find out about these things sooner?
I just sat and bawled while I watched this video of an arrangement they did on special request from Perez Hilton. It's a cover of "The Call" by Regina Spektor, from The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian.
Just watch their faces. Watch the enthusiasm of their conductor. And then run, don't walk to YouTube and watch more of their performances.
THIS, my friends, is why we need to keep the arts in schools:
ETA: Here are the lyrics:
It started out as a feeling
Which then grew into a hope
Which then turned into a quiet thought
Which then turned into a quiet word
And then that word grew louder and louder
Till it was a battle cry
I'll come back
When you call me
No need to say goodbye
Just because everything's changing
Doesn't mean it's never been this way before
All you can do is try to know who your friends are
As you head off to the war
Pick a star on the dark horizon
And follow the light
You'll come back when it's over
No need to say goodbye
You'll come back when it's over
No need to say goodbye
Now we're back to the beginning
It's just a feeling and no one knows yet
But just because they can't feel it too
Doesn't mean that you have to forget
Let your memories grow stronger and stronger
Till they're before your eyes
You'll come back
When they call you
No need to say goodbye
You'll come back
When they call you
No need to say goodbye...
January 22, 2009
A Game
Rules:
Step 1: Put your music player on shuffle.
Step 2: Post the first line (or verse) from the first 25 songs that play, no matter how embarrassing.
Step 3: Strike through the songs, or label it, when someone guesses both artist and track correctly and put the correct answer and who got it.
Step 4: For those who are guessing -- looking the lyrics up on a search engine is CHEATING!
Step 5: If you like the game post your own.
1. The summer wind came blowin' in from across the seas, it lingered there to touch your hair and walk with me...
2. I've this creeping suspicion that things here are not as they seem, reassure me, why do I feel as if I'm in too deep?
3.
4. I am the child that lives forever, let me run about, I can do the things that you will envy, wish and dream about. I run amuck don't give a f*ck, I will leave you all stranded for no reason when you least expect it.
5. Darling? (yes?) Robert. (what?) I worry. (why?) He's all alone. (Oh.) There's no one (where?) in his life (huh), Robert ought to have a woman...
6. I've got something to say that might cause you pain. If I catch you talking to that boy again, I'm gonna let you down and leave you flat.
7.
8.
9.
10. Strangely quiet, but now the storm simply rests to strike again. Standing, waiting, I think of her...I think of her. Strange this Mary, she leaves the room yet remains...she lingers on. Something stirs me to think of her...I think of her...
11. In my platforms I hit the floor. I fell facedown, didn't help my brain out, then my baby came before I found the magic oh, to keep her happy. I never was the fantasy of what you wanted me to be. Don't judge me so harsh, little girl.
12. Just too unreal all this...watching the worlds fall from my lips. Baiting some girl with hypotheses...
13.
14. When you look into my eyes, and you see the crazy gypsy in my soul, it always comes as a surprise when I feel my withered roots begin to grow. Well I never had a place that I could call my very own, but that's all right my love....
15. Lowering the standards in the process selective. The formula's too thin. But it takes more than one person, so everyone jump on. I'll miss you when you're just like them.
16.
17.
18.
19.
20. You've got your ball, you've got your chain tied to me tight, tie me up again.
21.
22.
23.
24.
25. This is a song...for the ladies. But fellas? Listen closely. You don't always have to f*ck her hard...in fact sometimes, that's not right to do.
LOL
WOW my shuffle SUCKED today. I'll be surprised if anyone gets any of these!
January 20, 2009
Happy Inauguration Day!
So, how was everyone's long weekend?
Here's a quick recap of mine:
Mini-cast parties had: 1
Traffic tickets gotten for MA license plates: 1
Times I've nearly sliced off my finger with a brand new kitchen knife: 1 (I am wearing the Peanuts band-aid to prove it)
NFC Championships won: 0. ZERO. Jerks.
Pairs of new jeans purchased at Kohl's: 1
Dresses found that will be perfect for my costume for the show: 1
YouTube videos that have made me laugh til I cried: 1 (see post below)
Times I've worked out: 3 (!!!!!!!)
So yes, it's been both a productive and a frustrating weekend, to say the very least. I did get a stupid traffic ticket for having Massachusetts license plates, still, which I think is RIDICULOUS. I mean honestly. The car is insured and the inspection is current. I really don't think it should matter. Whatever. At least, since I got pulled over for speeding, he only gave me the ticket for the plates, so hopefully I can get them replaced ASAP and get the ticket dismissed.
Yes, I nearly thought I'd have to go to the emergency room on Sunday night when I was washing dishes, which included one of our very new, very sharp knives and I nearly took the top half of my index finger off. All is well, though, and I have a bright and happy band-aid on it.
Yes, the Eagles nearly gave me a heart attack. But is this really news? They should have just lost it badly as they were the entire first half of the game. But noooooooooooo, they had to come back in the 3rd and 4th quarters and get the lead before reaching in, ripping out my heart, and stomping it to the ground. Yes, I cried. Don't judge me.
"Company" rehearsals are going quite well. I've felt very inspired to blog about the experience, or at least journal it offline, ever since finding this link last Friday. It's Kristin Huffman's ("Sarah" in the 2006 revival) journal of the process of putting the show together before it went to Broadway. I drank in every word she wrote and have since become rather obssessed with this amazing piece of theater we're putting together. Last night was our first full run through all of the music, and tonight, we start staging. ::claps hands excitedly::
So...I'm off to get some actual work done before slipping across the hall to News Services to watch the inauguration coverage. I hope to squeeze in a Teaser Tuesday later, but it may not happen. Happy Tuesday/Inauguration day!
January 17, 2009
January 15, 2009
Tagged. Again.
1. Once you’ve been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 16 random things, facts, habits, or goals about you.
2. At the end, choose 16 people to be tagged.
3. You have to tag the person who tagged you.
4. If I tagged you, it’s because I want to know more about you.
1. When I eat fast food, I can't wad up the wrappers into a little ball. I smooth them out and fold them, making neat creases, until I can't fold it any further. I have no idea why.
2. I'm freaked out at how quickly I've gotten a Baby Sniffle (I refuse to call it "fever") since we got married. Before the wedding I would've told you I wanted to raise dogs instead of children, but apparently putting the band on your finger changes everything. I'm fighting it with every ounce of my being. Somebody loan me your screaming child for the weekend, please.
3. I still try not to step on cracks on the sidewalk. I also try to take the same amount of steps between each crack.
4. I want to get my Master's in Journalism, but I have no desire to be a "journalist." At least not in the "news" format. Perhaps I'd like to have my own editorial column some day, or be a feature writer for magazines.
5. I absolutely LOATHE when people use an apostrophe to indicate plural. Example: "I'll see you guy's on Sunday." NO. NO YOU WILL NOT. It is just so freaking stupid on so many levels and so INEXCUSABLE that I work myself into a righteous lather over it on a daily basis. Poor grammar in general makes me want to scratch my eyes out. The Dr. Pepper billboards that advise me to "Drink it Slow" also make me want to run my car off a bridge.
6. Sometimes, when I'm bored, I'll figure out the solfege syllables to jingles and fight songs. It took me an entire train ride home one night last year to figure out the Eagles fight song.
7. I have no real desire to be pregnant (I know what you're thinking after reading #2 above). I've talked to friends who have struggled to conceive, and at one point I asked one, "Have you considered adoption?" and her reply was, "I just REALLY WANT to be pregnant." It was then that I realized, "I just really DON'T." Why can't the stork come?
8. I also have no desire to go through the process of owning a home. I am lucky that our first home is being sort of "given" to us, and I'm hoping to be there long enough for Operaboy's mom to retire to Rochester and sell us her house for what's left on it. I'm just missing a certain chip, I think.
9. I really wish I could plan another wedding. I don't want to save the money for it, but I have so many great ideas. I should be a wedding planner. Someone hire me.
10. I want to go to culinary school. Or at least some cooking classes at Central Market or something.
11. I think it's ridiculous that we are a society who can fit the entire world into an iPhone, yet people are still dying from cancer.
12. I will probably always nibble at, if not bite, my fingernails.
13. I have recently made a goal of trying to NOT be upset, pissed off, mad, overwhelmed, etc....and I'm working on that by trying to see any situation in a positive light. It's quite possibly the most difficult thing I've ever had to undertake.
14. It is my goal that I will sing a starring or supporting role onstage in 2009. (um...check)
15. I am truly terrified at the sudden rate at which people close to me (or people close to people close to me) are dying now that I'm approaching 30. It can't get any BETTER the older I get. I just wish it hadn't started off with such a bang.
16. I'm actually looking forward to my 10-year High School Reunion.
I don't think I'll tag anyone for this. That was just simply for your enjoyment. :)
Catching Up
But seriously folks, I was NOT a happy camper yesterday. I got to work around 8am as usual, and was just feeling...off. By noon I was on my way home, trying not to yak in the car. I went right to bed and woke up after an hour with a blinding headache, took some Excedrin migraine, and slept til 4:30. Finally felt okay (but sick hungry) when I woke up and throughout most of rehearsal. Yeesh.
And today I feel a lot better but I have been BUSY (which you'd know if you realized that I've had this post up and have been working on it since 8:30 this morning) at work catching up. It's better than being bored I suppose, right? :) Right.
So back to not feeling well...
I seriously don't know what's wrong with me lately. I'm constantly hungry, so maybe I have a tapeworm. I also just feel very blah in general. I think it might be because I've made a somewhat drastic change in my diet recently, and I'm trying to get my body used to life with smaller (read: more appropriate) portions and no Dr. Pepper (except on the weekends...I'm not a machine, people) so therefore very little sugar and caffeiene. I'm hoping that this all balances out in a few days so I can get to feeling normal again (whatever that means).
Okay I've lost all train of thought since I've had to piecemeal this blog together, so I'll be back tomorrow with better stuff, I hope. :)
Happy Thursday!
January 13, 2009
Teaser Tuesday - 1/13
Teaser Tuesdays: Grab your current read.Let the book fall open to a random page.
Share with us two (2) “teaser” sentences from that page, somewhere between lines 7 and 12.
You also need to share the title of the book that you’re getting your “teaser” from … that way people can have some great book recommendations if they like the teaser you’ve given!
Please avoid spoilers!
My Teaser sentences:
Bobby: Amy...marry me.
(pause. "Bobby Baby" underscoring)
Amy: Huh?
From the libretto of "Company," the musical I'm currently working on. Book by George Furth, music and lyrics by Stephen Sondheim.
I know. Lame that I used another "Company" Teaser Tuesday...but it's the only thing I have time to read right now. Plus, perhaps if I tease you all with lines from the show, you'll be interested enough to come see it! :)
January 12, 2009
A memory
As I reached down to tie my sneakers, my exhausted and overworked mind registered a faint greenish tint peeking through the cracks in my curtains. Could it be dawn already? Another night spent at the computer. Another night running the gamut of emotions in this long-distance communication I was stupid enough to call a relationship. I cursed at myself for not getting the sleep I'd promised my best friend I'd get (she'd notice...she always did), grabbed my keys, and quietly left the house before having to deal with any questions from my parents.
On the drive over to the high school football field/track, I realized with dismay that this was becoming a routine: work a double shift waiting tables (working open to close meant that I didn't have any time to sit and think about things, and I was just fine with that), grab a salad between shifts to keep up appearances, drive the long 45-minute commute home, boot up the computer and shower, eat a bowl of cereal while waiting for email to load, and feel a strange mixture of elation and dread when I see his name come up on my messenger list, accompanied by the harsh chime notifier of the first message. The night flies by as we chat about everything and nothing, and before I know it a new day is breaking.
I slammed the car door with more force than was necessary as I made my way to the oval track. It was still early; the sun was barely up and the grass was still wet with dew. It was a relatively cool morning for July in Texas, although the forecast promised baking heat and humidity before mid-day.
I sat down on the track on the faded numbers at the start line and began to stretch my leg muscles. They were shaking from exhaustion and lack of nourishment. How long had it been since I'd slept more than 2 hours in a night? How much longer had it been since I'd eaten a decent meal?
I stood and hopped up and down a couple of times, loving as always the way a track will give, making me feel like I was weightless (oh, if only), and started off. "I wonder how far I can go today," I wondered. "Yesterday it was a full mile and a half before I threw up."
As I began to run, I replayed my conversations with him in my head. It had started out as every other night. We spoke about our day, what we had done and what funny things we had heard on the radio. We spoke about our jobs. I talked about some of my more interesting customers at the restaurant, he spoke of the fires in Colorado and how he and his fellow firemen were working nearly round-the-clock. I worried about him, and told him this. He assured me that he was taking care of himself, and that he constantly thought of me.
Then I stupidly remembered to tell him about something hilarious that had had me and a co-worker in stitches between the morning and afternoon shifts during the day. A male co-worker. Previous conversations with him should have reminded me that I should have left the gender detail out of the story, but things were going so well on this night that I hadn't thought to be careful.
The jealousy was immediate. The doubt, the accusations, the fear that he would lose me since he couldn't be physically with me. I immediately backpedaled, trying desperately to reassure him that he was the only one in my thoughts, every hour of every day. And this was true. I thought about him at the restaurant, I thought about him on the drive to and from work, I thought of him in the shower, and I thought of him in my dreams. Every ounce of every part of me that wasn't physical belonged to him. This concerned those close to me, as they all knew that we had met through an on-line dating service.
Again I begged him to please let me speak to him, to please call me so I could tell him how much he meant to me. He refused, giving me the same excuses which, in retrospect, should have greatly worried me.
Through the haze of my memory, I became vaguely aware of my feet hitting the track more loudly as I thought of this particular argument.
For hours, we went back and forth, until I finally was dissolved into a hiccuping, crying mess and saying that I didn't think this was going to work anymore, this was just too hard. Now it was his turn to backpedal. He was immediately apologetic, begging me to please forgive him. He told me how often he thought of me, how he had my picture taped up right next to his computer so he could imagine I was actually there. He told me how he wanted to touch me, to kiss me, to hold me tightly in his arms and never let me go.
I began to run faster as I remembered this. Years of insecurity about my body attacked me as I started to panic about the first time we would meet (if ever, due to our distance and his job). Would he like what he saw? Would my thighs be too big for him? Would my stomach be flat enough? Would he like that my collar bone was so pronounced (a recent discovery that I was quite proud of)?
He just couldn't. Few men had ever shown this much interest in my physical appearance, so I didn't trust this. I knew that I was intelligent and witty and a good conversationalist, but I couldn't trust that to keep any man I was attracted to so strongly as I was to him.
I ran until I felt my legs turn to jelly. I stopped where I was and fell to my knees, my empty stomach heaving. How far had I run this time? I was too preoccupied with my thoughts to have noticed.
I sat until it began to get hot outside, the Texas humidity beginning to bear down on my weak body. I wiped away the tears and slowly walked back to my car. I managed a small smile at the morning walkers as I passed them, and drove home. I vowed that today would be better.
I showered, considered breakfast before deciding I didn't have time, and dressed for work. I'd need to go shopping again soon; these pants barely stayed around my waist with the belt notched as far over as it would go. I checked my email one last time before leaving and I had only one message. The timestamp showed that it had been sent while I was running. It was short, to the point:
I'll think of you all day.
I sighed and fresh tears of fear and self-loathing filled my eyes as I realized I'd do the same thing.
January 11, 2009
Feelin' kinda Sunday
The Eagles won, thereby increasing my heartburn as they progress through the playoffs. Supposedly everyone after the Giants are much more manageable than the Giants. We'll see. Operaboy keeps saying things like "When the Eagles play/win the Super Bowl..." and I just have to run from the room with my hands over my ears so that I can get to the nearest wooden item on which to knock. Football gives me hives.
Unpacking is progressing along. I've been hanging pictures whilst watching the Golden Globes in a half-assed way (it's only interesting towards the very end when the stars are drunk. Case in point: Dustin Hoffman...whom I'm afraid will any minute now be eaten by a suddenly quite large Emma Thompson). This place is actually starting to look like a home now.
Back into the hornet nest tomorrow (pun intended, for those of you that will get it). Ah, Monday. I'm actually looking forward to another week of rehearsals with some of the most talented people I've ever met.
Hope everyone had a lovely weekend!
January 10, 2009
We'll be here all week
January 9, 2009
Testing, 1...2...
In the past 24 hours alone I have learned that:
- Someone I respect and admire VERY much was laid off from his job
- A friend via the internets has suffered a devastating miscarriage (is there any other kind?)
- A wonderful friend from HS is in the hospital. I can guess why, but the other friend who told me doesn't feel at liberty to elaborate without my friend's permission (which is frustrating, but which I can completely respect).
It's just...I don't know...really hard to digest sometimes without allowing the stress to overwhelm me. The emotional being that pervades most of the time wants to start to hyperventilate, cry, etc. until things get resolved, but the tinier (yet growing stronger) part of me that sees logic and the power of prayer and calm is slowly making herself a more prominent fixture.
Alone, I can handle these events. When thrown at me BAM BAM BAM without warning, it's a bit harder to comprehend and take a step back from it all and compartmentalize.
I think that the hardest part for me is that every part of me wants to fix things for them. I'm a bleeding heart, and I freely admit that.
So, rather than panicking, I'm blogging, so that the time it takes to type everything out allows time for me to take deep breaths, pause, and lift each one of them and their families up in prayer that God will hold them in His healing hands (whether or not they want Him to) and make their burdens light.
January 8, 2009
Oops
It doesn't count if you miss on account of illness, right? I'll just cheat a little and post this for YESTERDAY. Heh. Yes, I can and will do that.
Back later (after coffee and breakfast) with better stuffs. Happy
January 7, 2009
Playing for Change
In the body of the email was a link to a YouTube clip. These forwards are always a bit dubious, because in no way can you tell the content of the video from the link itself, and she had only added a smiley face to the body of the email. So, I clicked on it, figuring "what the hell, I'm at home, so if it's inappropriate it's no big deal."
The video was one in what is to be a series of many that will be on a DVD for an organization called Playing For Change. The Mission Statement of Playing for Change is as follows:
The Playing For Change Foundation (PFCF) is dedicated to connecting the world
through music by providing resources (including but not limited to facilities,
supplies, and educational programs) to musicians and their communities around
the world. PFCF supports projects inspired by the communties featured in the
Playing For Change documentary film series.
This video held me spellbound for the entire time (nearly 5 minutes), because I was just so taken with this concept. I am (obviously) a BIG supporter of music education, so it's highly likely that I'll be joining this cause in any way I can (and I'm still looking into the website and reading the blog for ways I can help in my community, even if it's just by a donation).
Just watch this video...I love watching musicians, and I love watching even the filmmakers when the camera pans to them, as they are so obviously enjoying what they do. I truly think the world can and will be a better place, and what better way to unite people than through music -- a universal language? Enjoy:
January 6, 2009
Teaser Tuesday - 1/6
Teaser Tuesdays: Grab your current read.Let the book fall open to a random page.
Share with us two (2) “teaser” sentences from that page, somewhere between lines 7 and 12.
You also need to share the title of the book that you’re getting your “teaser” from … that way people can have some great book recommendations if they like the teaser you’ve given!
Please avoid spoilers!
My Teaser sentences:
Paul: Amy, after all these years, don't you know we fit?
Amy: The higher you go, the harder you hurt when you fall.
From the libretto of "Company," the musical I'm currently working on. Book by George Furth, music and lyrics by Stephen Sondheim.
January 5, 2009
2008: A Survey
Where did you begin 2008?
At Dana's apartment in Brookline, MA. We left immediately after midnight b/c I'd been so sick.
What was your status by Valentine's Day?
Engaged, deciding to move back to Texas.
Were you in school (anytime this year)?
I was not.
Did you have to go to the hospital?
Only to visit people, which sucked.
Did you have any encounters with the police?
Just the one douchebag that pulled us over on Rte 1 and was a complete JERK.
Where did you go on vacation?
Well, we went to Disney World on our Honeymoon.
What did you purchase that was over $500?
A wedding.
Did you know anybody who got married?
SEVERAL: myself, my brother, and my Knotties of course.
Did you know anybody who passed away?
Yes. :(
Did you move anywhere?
To Texas from Boston
What sporting events did you attend?
We went to a Cowboys/Eagles Monday Night Football game back in September.
What concerts/shows did you go to?
I don't think any, other than what we performed in. We were saving money like crazy.
Where do you live now?
Texas
What's the one thing you thought you would never do but did in 2008?
Got a house.
What has/have been your favorite moment(s)?
Getting married. :)
What's something you learned about yourself?
That I'm able to find a positive in (almost) any situation. It makes the day-to-day crap much easier to bear.
Any new additions to your family?
I gained a sister-in-law when my brother got married, and a whole new set of in-laws when I got married.
What was your best month?
September
What music will you remember 2008 by?
The songs I picked for my wedding DVD.
Any regrets?
Not ONE.
What do you want to change in 2009?
I want to spend more time on the stage, and I want to of course be healthier. Continue to work on my marriage, and continue with the difficult task of being a positive person most, if not all, the time.
Overall, how would you rate(or award) this year?
Probably the best year of my life so far.
What would you change about 2008?
I would have more money. I know it's not important, but it sure eases the stress.
Other than home, where did you spend most of your time?
Working.
Change your hairstyle?
Nope. It just keeps growing.
Get a new job?
Yes I did! I started in October.
Do you have a New Year's resolution?
See a few questions up...
Did anything embarrassing?
Oh, a few. :)
What was/were your favorite purchase[s]?
Wedding and honeymoon (they count!)
Get married or divorced?
Yes, I got married (duh).
Be honest - did you watch American Idol?
Occasionally...not with as much regularity as I have in other seasons.
Did you get sick this year?
YES! Bronchitis knocked me on my ass in January/February.
Start a new hobby?
Working on the house, I guess.
Been snowboarding?
No thank you.
Are you happy to see 2008 go?
In some ways, because it's no use looking backward. But it was a wonderful year.
Drank Starbucks in 2008?
Um, really? Of course.
What are you wishing for in 2009?
A healthy family. That's all. I feel too blessed to ask for more!
E-A-G-L-E-S, EAGLES!!
I almost hate it when they win a playoff game. Because then I just get my hopes up, when in all likelihood they will lose next week to the Giants.
But that Brian Westbrook touchdown had me jumping up and down and screaming because ZOMG The OFFENSE actually scored?! It's about freaking time.
So...we live to fight another day (next Sunday, to be exact).
Have I mentioned that I love Brian Westbrook? Yeah.
January 3, 2009
Babies, babies, babies...
It seems like EVERYONE I know is either pregnant or has just had a baby. I don't know what's in the water around here, exactly, but I'm staying away from it as long as I can!! Don't get me wrong... I LOVE babies, and I do plan to have one or more of my own some day. Also, I've got a little baby cough...nowhere near bad enough to be called baby "fever" yet, but it's there. I'm just not quite ready yet! We've only been married for four months, and we've got our hands full with the Operahaus.
However, when I see gorgeous gals like my friend Jessica (the obviously pregnant beauty in red in the pictures above), I get very sentimental and can almost hear my biological clock give out a few feeble ticks.
This afternoon was SO much fun, and I'm incredibly happy for Jessica and Jason. I have known them both since first grade, and they both were in my graduating class, along with Jessica's twin sister, Jodi (pictured on the other side of Jessica in the first picture), so it was really surreal to see her so far along in her pregnancy today. This was the same girl with whom I would slide down the slides with on the playground in first grade, while we both wore her big pink puffy coat (we'd put one arm in the sleeve closest to us, and wrap our inside arms around each other and zip the thing up before going down. It was great fun!).
So in the spirit of January's NaBloPoMo theme, "Change," I'm sitting here with a few tears pricking the backs of my eyes as I upload these pictures and reflect on how much time has passed and all the wonderful changes we can look forward to as adults...and how blessed I am to have known them for so long.
Congratulations to my dear friends. I can't wait to be Aunt Operawife to baby Ethan next month!
January 2, 2009
Guh.
I'm EXHAUSTED! Suddenly it's almost 8pm? Where has the day gone? Oh yeah...woke up early, FiOS people came out (one of whom was a total dreamboat, btw...my mom and I were lovin' that), went to Home Depot twice, fought with the showerhead for about a half an hour, cleaned the refrigerator for what just might be the first time in 20 years, etc. etc. etc...
But we're here!!!! As of last night, we are officially inhabitants of the Operahaus. I do have more pictures, I just don't have the energy to upload them right now. And Operaboy is telling me that we have to go grocery shopping tonight (no! noooooooooo!!!!!!).
Tomorrow on the docket? Baby shower for a dear friend from High School (what, we're having BABIES now?? Geez) and continuing the unpacking process.
I hope the 2nd day of 2009 was fun for everyone...I'm gonna go crash on the couch until Operaboy peels me off to go shopping...