December 20, 2009

Days 3 and 4

I ask again -- Could I have picked a more difficult time to try to kickstart my diet plan?? But, honestly, if I can make it through the holidays and be stern with myself (but not militant, which could cause ridiculous cravings and horrible bingeing as a result, which would only lead to you see where I'm going here?), then I can make it through most "normal" times.

Friday night was the cast party for the show I'm working on right now. I was so hungry backstage, so I texted my good buddy and said "HALP WHAT DO I EAT AT CAST PARTY!?" She gave me some helpful suggestions, and told me she'd be asking for a report the next day. Having that kind of accountability really helps me SO much.

My sisters-in-law and I also had our 2nd Annual Holiday Cookie Baking day yesterday. Guh. My sisters-in-law are quite thin (and easily seems like they don't even try), and were munching on Whataburger taquitos when I got there. Luckily I had anticipated this and had eaten on my own before I left the house. I only had a small bite of each kind of cookie we baked (and completely avoided the chocolate self-filling cupcakes - which were filled with cream cheese and chocolate chips) and I drank water most of the day -- after my morning cup of Joe of course.

Last night, after the show, the group all went to Sweetwater in Denton, which was like MY OWN PERSONAL HELL. I knew I wasn't really HUNGRY, but being there and not eating cheese fries or fried pickles or even having a beer was REALLY hard for me. But, I managed, and since I was feeling a bit hungry when I got home, I had a small bowl of Special K Vanilla Almond Cereal instead.

* Resisting Temptation at at least 3 separate occasions
* Entering in my calories and coming in at or UNDER my goal
* Telling my friends and family WHY I'm making these choices, so that they don't hound me (or ask me if I'm pregnant) when I avoid snacks and alcohol.

Onward we go.

December 18, 2009

The Day of Reckoning, plus 1 and 2

Today is my first "official" day after the Day of Reckoning, which occured between 12am and 2am on Wednesday night (or Thursday morning if you want to get all official about it).

This is the first time in my life I have ever counted calories. I've always been against it, and I think it's because of my mother. She is CONSUMED with it, and in a really obnoxious way. I just knew I didn't want to be one of those obnoxious fitness nuts that people can't stand to be around, and so I ended up going wayyyyyyyyy too far the other direction.

It took seeing videos of myself singing at a concert to really wake me up. It also completely killed my buzz of having a very successful musical project come to fruition, but, whatever works I guess. I knew I had to make a change.


Could I have picked a more difficult time to start tracking calories and watching what I eat? Seriously. It's Chistmas time and there is FOOD ALL AROUND ME AT ALL TIMES. This is going to be really hard. But, I did NOT want to just tell myself "Oh, I'll wait until after New Year's to really get started."

It's time to get serious. It's time to make a change. I can already tell that the hardest part is going to be getting my body used to a fairly drastic drop in calorie intake every day. I'm hungry, and I need to buy things that I can snack on without going through my daily calories goal. I know I can do this. I KNOW I can.

This is the beginning of what I hope will be a long and VERY fruitful journey.