November 6, 2012

No Shame November -- Vanity and Social Media

That's right, betches. I'm combining topics! Because I suck at keeping up with these things over the weekend AND because I want to and I can do what I want because it's NO SHAME NOVEMBER!!

But I really do think that these two topics -- Vanity and Social Media -- go hand in hand. Most of us aren't promoting a company or a business or an "identity" on Facebook or Twitter...we're just promoting ourselves. We like the feedback.  We enjoy the interaction and the positive reinforcement we get from our hundreds of friends/follower (and we call social media stupid when the response is negative). 

Look, I'm definitely not judging.  I'm guilty of this 100%.  I've touched on this before and said I'd blog about it someday, so I guess now is as good a time as any. 

I struggle a lot with vanity. 

I always have and it's gotten me into trouble. Luckily, I have friends and a husband who love me regardless.

No, I'm not talking about the GPOYs (Gratuitous Photo of Yourself), even though I recognize how obnoxious those can be.  I'm talking about really getting into a cycle of not only loving the validation, but seeking it out from places I shouldn't. You know what makes that a whole lot easier? Social media.

Social media = vanity = social media.  That's math, fools.  MATH WITH WORDS.

Recently I deleted a Tumblr account and then started up a nice, shiny new one.  Why?  Because I realized at one point that Tumblr was where I went to be "secret." It's a place that most people in my everyday life didn't know I even had. It was the same name as my Twitter handle and Instagram account name, so it's not like it was the Fort Knox of social media sites, but I didn't advertise it.  I said and posted things there that I wouldn't necessarily want my friends, family or husband to see.  Even friends on Facebook or's easy to go private/direct messages and "harmlessly" say things or give compliments. 

And it's a dangerous road.  Trust me.  It felt good to feel validated. But hell, even drugs feel good at first! Then you get to the long-term effects, and it becomes a hot damn mess.

(Did I just compare social media to drugs?  Whatever, I stand by it.)

The point I'm trying to make is that I recognize my vanity.  I recognize my love for social media. I've been honest with myself and with my husband and with some close friends about the struggles I have sometimes.  It's all about finding a balance and controlling it. 

Now I try to live a life -- online and offline -- in which, if at any moment my husband or my Mom or Dad could look in and see what I'm saying/doing/writing/typing/texting, they would think it was fine...even if it was a little "too Mandy" for them.  (This is where I would put a smiley face emoticon.)

Because social media can be awesome for support...

....but it needs to be positive, above-the-line support that is building me up in a good way...not in the self-destructive, vain way that only provides temporary pleasure/contentment. 

1 comment:

  1. uh duh. well said :) who doesn't like to flaunt their own feathers here and there?!